Monday, January 7, 2013

Author Blackmailed By Reader


Yes, you read it correctly. I regret to inform readers of this blog that I have been sent a blackmail letter. My detective skills kicked in and I twigged to the fact that this was a blackmail letter when I sniffed out this clue:

The letter inside was from some pre-pubescent twerp demanding that I pose with a stupid little ceramic dog that he had, no doubt, made himself, and upload the pictures to my Facebook page.




The twerp I speak of says that he has blackmailed other children's authors like Andy Griffiths and Martin Chatterton to do the same and asked me to 'check out their Facebook history'. Well, I won't 'check out' anything and I won't stand for it! Do you hear me, you pre-pubescent, blackmailing ceramicist? This is not on! Children's authors aren't play things for you to humiliate. We are respected members of the community, sharing knowledge, creativity and a love of literature. Do you understand me?

That is all.

(But just in case you are dangerous and you do happen to know where I live here's another picture of me with the dog. By the way, you're not getting him back, you filthy scoundrel.)



3 comments:

From Raph... The Blackmailing mastermind of destruction and world domination!!!!! said...

MWUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
I knew you would do it Tristan...
or should I say... Tristo the Bisto the Rickstickstisto!!

Tristan Bancks said...

This is really freakin' me out now, dog boy.

Anonymous said...

he he very cute, Trisan

isobelle

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